Cincinnati Coyotes

In parts of suburban Cincinnati, the high-pitched howls start as early as 11pm and carry through until after dawn from the growing population of coyotes. Dogs have been mauled and cats have disappeared. Residents have complained that the coyotes are getting too close for comfort, possibly attracted by a few neighbors setting out bologna to feed the animals.

In Ohio, and across the nation, they are considered a threat to livestock and can legally be killed, even though organizations such as People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals have spoken out against extermination. Communities are struggling to find an answer to the problem.

Simple problem with a simple solution. Put a bounty on the coyotes. If it's desired to solve the problem quickly, make it a high bounty. If it's high enough, the entire population could be wiped out in a week.

Ohio Beltway Shooting Suspect Update

(Columbus, Ohio) According to this story, the suspect in the Ohio beltway shootings, Charles A. McCoy Jr., is in hiding and believed to have a semiautomatic pistol and ammunition. Also, more information has been released about him.

Charles A. McCoy Jr., 28, lived with his mother within miles of where the gunman's bullets killed a passenger, shattered windshields, dented school buses and drilled into homes and a school.

"McCoy has had mental health issues in the past and is currently not on medication," the Franklin County Sheriff's Office said in a bulletin released to police departments across the country." He is believed to have suicidal or homicidal tendencies."

It seems that the basis for a defense is being planted in the public's conscience before any charges have been filed.

Rotten Sneaker Contest

(Montpelier, VT.) This year's winner of the coveted Golden Sneaker Award for having the smelliest sneakers is 10-year-old Daegan Goodman of Montpelier, known as the "Rotten Sneaker Capital of the World." The final determination of the most rotten smelling sneakers is made by expert George Aldrich, who smells professionally. In addition to smell, sneakers are judged on appearance and overall condition.

Every Week for Eighteen Months

Achieving a quiet, but notable, milestone is this week's Carnival of the Vanities at Patterico's Pontifications. A year and a half after being launched by Bigwig, the carnival has consistently grown in its appeal and has fostered a number of similar collective efforts. Applause! Applause! And congratulations to Bigwig and all the writers and readers.

Next week's host is Pete Holiday.

Business Hiring Practices

I like to keep an eye peeled for business-related information posts and here's one I found at GDay Mate about hiring cannibals.

A large corporation recently hired several cannibals.

"You are all part of our team now", said the HR rep during the welcoming briefing. "You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please.. don't eat any of the other employees".

The cannibals promised they would not.

Four weeks later their boss remarked, "You're all working very hard, and I'm satisfied with your work. However, one of our secretaries has disappeared. Do any of you know what happened to her?"

The cannibals all shook their heads no. After the boss had left, the leader of the cannibals said to the others, "Which one of you idiots ate the secretary?"

A hand rose hesitantly.

"You fool!" the leader continued. "For four weeks we've been eating managers and no one noticed anything. But NOOOooo, you had to go and eat someone who actually does something!!!"

I agree. Praise the secretaries.

Suspect Identified in Ohio Beltway Shootings

(Columbus, OH) The Franklin County Sheriff's Office has released the name of a suspect in a series of 24 highway shootings around Columbus. The suspect is Charles A. McCoy Jr., 28, and is considered armed and dangerous. He's a 5-foot-8, 185-pound white male with brown hair and green eyes and drives a dark green 1999 Geo Metro with a black hood.

Authorities want the public's help in locating McCoy.

School Board Member Targets Teacher

(Cole County, MO) Using the school system logo and without approval, board member Sarah Renick sent an evaluation form to 90 district patrons asking probing questions about a specific math teacher.

The Cole County R-5, Eugene, School Board will not review a teacher evaluation survey recently sent to district patrons by one board member, the board said Thursday night.

The board made its announcement following a meeting that included comments from several district patrons, superintendent Mark Blythe said.

[ ... ]

The survey reportedly sought to gain input on parents' perceptions of the teacher's lesson planning and preparedness, among other things, Blythe said. However, Blythe said he and members of the school board were not told the survey was being distributed.

This story is so typical. With regularity, local school boards seem to always have at least one eccentric member that feuds with the world in general and a few individuals in particular. In this case, board member Sarah Renick wanted to put the stink of suspicion on one teacher and succeeded.

Court Petitioned to Remove School Board Member

(St. Louis, MO) Here's another story about a school board member who is eccentric and, apparently, mentally unstable. Rochell Moore is considered "physically combative." She has doused an administator with ice water and has threatened violence against anyone questioning her mental fitness.

The petition filed Monday in St. Louis Circuit Court by assistant superintendent Charlene Jones, her secretary and a dozen others came three days after a St. Louis judge issued a temporary order barring the board's Rochell Moore from contact with Jones and board member Amy Hilgemann.

Moore, 40, has said she believes Jones and Hilgemann are part of political plot to discredit her. She claims they dosed her with cocaine before Moore was committed for October 2002 psychiatric help against her will.

[ ... ]

Last week, Moore called her soaking of Jones justified, likening herself to civil rights icon Rosa Parks and saying that when it comes to her mental fitness, "from this day forward, anyone who brings that issue up, I am getting violent."

Last year, Moore threatened to kill the city's former comptroller, Virvus Jones, and also sent a letter placing a curse on Mayor Francis Slay.

State law allows a circuit judge to remove a school board member. A hearing before St. Louis Circuit Judge David Dowd is scheduled for March 24.

I have to keep reminding myself that reasonable, caring, and informed voters elect these aberrant personalities to oversee our education systems. Sheesh!

Germany's National Pension System

With horror stories about Social Security funding in and out of the news in the US, it's not surprising that other countries also have the problem. Here's one:

The German parliament on Thursday passed a modified version of legislation that will radically change the way national pension benefits are calculated. In the future, the level of retirement benefits will depend on the size of the workforce in relationship to the number of retirees. Pensions will automatically decline as the German population shrinks over the next 25 years.

The current pay-as-you-go national pension system relies on four workers supporting every retiree. In 25 years, there'll be only two workers per retiree and they intend to reduce pension payments accordingly.

German workers currently pay 19.5% of their gross income into the national pension program. For comparison, US workers are contributing about 8% of their gross into Social Security with another 8% contributed by the employer.

Best of Me Symphony

The Bloggywood Squares Edition of the Best of Me Symphony is posted at The Owner's Manual. Go visit.

Fighting Media Bias

(Belton, MO) This story illustrates one method used by small-town American citizens to counter obvious bias in the local media. According to Belton Police Capt. Don Spears, Assistant Fire Chief Dana Marconett entered The Belton Journal newspaper office and "put down a newspaper with some kind of fecal matter."

Connie McCann, publisher of The Journal, said that a newspaper employee met the man at the counter. McCann said the man threw a folded paper "full of feces" across a counter, hitting the woman in the stomach and splattering feces on her, the counter and the floor.

It seems the newspaper published an unflattering editorial about Marconett's wife. He now faces a charge of scattering rubbish, with six months in prison and a $500 fine as possible punishment.

Sears Tower Sold

My Realtor deserves a good whack on the fanny for not telling me that the Chicago skyscraper was on the market. A New York investment group purchased the 110-story structure for $835 million.

Counterfeit $50 Bills

(Lancaster, Ohio) He wears a coat and tie and is passing fake $50 bills in Central Ohio. So far, he's bought cookware, tools and computer equipment. Keep an eye out. By the way, all the bills have the same serial number.

Microsoft Lawsuits

With curiosity as motivation, I've been following the many and varied lawsuits being adjudicated against Microsoft with no preconceptions about any resultant observations I might have. Obviously, a scorecard was necessary, so I prepared one identifying the litigants, basis of the lawsuit, important dates, summary of status, and details of rulings/settlements. Compiling data was fairly easy at first, but I soon became overwhelmed and realized I needed a spreadsheet, not a scorecard. It seems that every major and minor competitor, along with the federal and state governments, are or have been involved in lawsuits against Microsoft. Throw into the mix the foreign lawsuits, notably Europe and the Far East, that are pending, ongoing, or anticipated and the total number of individual cases became unmanageable for one part-time observer. I literally threw up my hands when I realized the amount of study I was facing.

With that in mind, I decided it would be prudent to distance myself somewhat from the details to preclude becoming obsessive. Analyzing the Microsoft legal quagmire is like analyzing a shooting match, from the design of the shotgun to the trajectory of the skeet. It can be done, but it'll drive a person crazy. Maintaining a generally knowledgeable awareness of the subject seemed to be healthier and, on this basis, I gleaned only one salient observation. It is that Microsoft is Gulliver and every Lilliputian in the Kingdom is trying tie him down and the people benefiting the most are the lawyers.

But I knew that before I started.

Schools Vote on Dress Codes

(Rock Hill, South Carolina) Voting is ongoing in deciding whether parents approve establishing a student dress code at two local middle schools. Principals Al Leonard of Saluda Trail Middle School and Kelly Kane of Castle Heights Middle School became concerned seeing 12 and 13-year-old girls with bare tummies and stiletto heels while the boy students sported droopy trousers exposing much of their underwear. Consequently, the faculty, parents and administrators devised dress codes to be voted on for approval.

Results have not been reported, but two things are apparent. One is that the students are opposed. No surprise here. The other is that the institution of dress codes are customarily followed by a decrease in disciplinary reports as indicated by the experiences of other area schools.

My take is that dress codes are a good idea and they should be universal in schools. And a comment I have is that 12 and 13-year-old girls with bare midriffs and stiletto heels sounds pornographic.

Best Cities for the Homeless

(Key West, FL) Although San Francisco remains at the top, Key West has become a contender as best city in which to be homeless.

The city plans to build a tent city, called a safe zone, next to the jail, pending county approval next week. The safe zone would have large Quonset hut or chickee structures, bathrooms, showers and a laundry facility.

Also, the city is looking forward to developing long-range plans to provide benefits for vagrants throughout the Florida Keys. These actions have Key West breaking into the top five of the rankings and will make it unique by being the only city to provide free laundry facilities to attract vagrants. Coupled with the subtropical weather, the benefits offered by Key West may allow it to move up in the standings. Expect their homeless numbers to increase. Here's a look at the current rankings:

BEST CITIES for the HOMELESS

1) San Francisco, California - Due to the high pay structure, by far, it is the most attractive city for vagrants.

2) Chicago, Illinois - Current 10-year program to build homes and provide paychecks will enhance Chicago's competitiveness.

3) Miami, Florida - A traditionally favored destination that has not improved in accordance with current trends, but is still attractive.

4) Los Angeles, California - Another traditional destination that used to top the list. Competitiveness is impacted by poor recordkeeping caused by transient nature of their vagrants.

5) Key West, Florida - Bumped Denver from the top five by providing free laundry services to their vagrants.

HONORABLE MENTION - Denver, Honolulu, Phoenix, Portland, Seattle

Homeless people throughout the nation are encouraged to consult the list when making travel plans.

FCC Fines Clear Channel $247,500

(Washington, D.C.) In its vigorous campaign against indecency, the Federal Communications Commission has proposed fining several stations owned by Clear Channel Communications Inc. Alleged are nine violations involving the "Elliot and the Morning" radio program broadcast from Washington, D.C. The show featured a filthy discussion of sexual practices by a female caller and porn star Ron Jeremy.

The proposal to hand out the maximum fine of $27,500 per incident was "because of Clear Channel's history of violations relating to the broadcast of indecent material," the agency wrote.

"Clear Channel has been the subject of repeated indecency actions at the FCC, and this show in particular has been the subject of previous complaints," wrote FCC Commissioner Michael Copps, who said the violations should have triggered license-revocation proceedings. The "cost-of-doing business fine is never going to stop the media's slide to the bottom."

Considerable attention has been directed toward Clear Channel due to their questionable content. They recently agreed to pay a $775,000 fine for the on-air antics of filth-sensationalists Howard Stern and Bubba the Love Sponge.

Catherine Bosley Lawsuit

(Youngstown, OH) As discussed previously, television anchor Catherine Bosley became fairly famous for taking off all her clothes at a videotaped wet t-shirt contest while on vacation. After her image was plastered all over the Internet, she filed a lawsuit in US District Court stating the pictures were distributed without her permission. One of those named in the suit is SexBrat.com who claims they legally secured the rights for distribution of her images from DreamGirls, a Florida video production company.

It's unknown how long it will take for the court to adjudicate the lawsuit, but Bosley's case appears weak. She signed a release before the event and notices were posted at the location informing everyone that the wet t-shirt contest would be photographed and videotaped.

Stay tuned.

Snowplow Driver Protests Bush

(Cleveland, OH) While working on temporary assignment providing support for President Bush's motorcade, Michael Gertenslager decided to express a political protest. He placed a large sign displaying "TRAITOR" on the side of his ODOT snowplow while it blocked traffic for the motorcade. An Ohio Highway Patrol officer observed the sign and reported Gertenslager who was later suspended.

My take is that Mr. Gertenslager is not a deep thinker. Conducting a political protest against a Republican President while drawing a paycheck from a state government headed by Republicans is probably job suicide. Hopefully, he has a lot of political chips he can cash in.

Sobriety Checkpoints Announced

Police will be manning sobriety checkpoints this St. Patrick's Day in at least sixteen communities across Cuyahoga County to satisfy a mandatory requirement for receiving federal funds. Locations have not been announced, but it's safe to assume that they'll be on your normal path home.