Momma's Boys and Daddy's Little Girls

(University Heights, Ohio) During this week's conference of Catholic educators at John Carroll University, John Ropar, Director of Counseling, stated that the current generation of college students are unable to cope with simple problems as a result of overprotective parenting.

"What we have done is woven this web of support and safety where they don't learn that if they fall down and skin their knees, that they will be OK," says Ropar, stepfather of three daughters, ages 19, 21 and 23.

"They don't learn to develop a sense of self-efficacy - I can do it, I can manage. Then they arrive on our campus and have roommate conflicts and don't have the slightest idea how to deal with it."

I agree. Many parents don't teach their children how to make good decisions nor do they force them to accept responsibility for their behavior. This is because we live in a society where nobody is responsible for the bad things that happen to them because there is always someone else to blame. So parents continue to protect children well past childhood. How many times have we heard of teenagers doing something exceedingly dumb, only to be followed by their parents armed with lawyers ready to sue the school, the store, the teacher, the police, the road, the tree, and the brewery. According to Ropar,

"We as parents have to allow for a latitude of choices for our sons and daughters," he said. "Eventually, parents just have to let go."

Think about it. When people start college, they are typically 18 or over - old enough to vote, old enough to join the military. They also should be considered old enough for their parents to quit pestering their teachers.