Madison Should Secede From Wisconsin

(Madison, Wisconsin) Doug Moe, a columnist for The Capital Times, has analyzed the historic disputes between the leftist city of Madison and the state of Wisconsin and concluded that the city should secede from the state. Moe believes that Madison would be a nice fit as part of the state of California.

I think what Moe isn't considering is the fact that Madison is in perennial conflict with the rest of the state because of the influence of the University of Wisconsin. If the university were shut down and moved -- lock, stock, and library -- to California, then Madison would be in harmony with the rest of the state. The buildings could be turned into cheese factories and another university for the state could be started in a different city, say Green Bay or Appleton. Then all problems would be solved and no legal maneuvering, such as succession, would be necessary.

Of course, a move like I've suggested wouldn't be easy. Machine designers would find it inconceivable to create a shovel large enough to move such a leftist pile of academia in one scoop.