Muslim Small Talk Banned in Bathrooms

According to Islamic rules, talking in the bathroom is prohibited. In response to an inquiry from a reader concerning the acceptability of simple greetings in the john, an expert provided the following.

From ArabNews.com:

The Islamic greeting, Salam alaikum, uses one of God's names, Salam, which means "peace," and offers it to whomever we are greeting. We should always show profound respect to God and His attributes. A bathroom is not a place where people should indulge in conversation or discuss any matter. It is a place where people answer the call of nature and leave, or they take off their clothes to have a shower. Islamic manners make it clear that the less said in a bathroom the better.

Hence, we must not mention God's name or the name of the Prophet Muhammad or any prophet there. We are better advised to do whatever we need to do and leave.

Reflecting on personal experience from working at a large firm with many Muslim engineers, the no-talking-in-bathroom characteristic was noticed but attributed to a general standoffishness. Who knew?

Nevertheless, the specific punishment for talking in the bathroom isn't discussed in the article. I would guess that it includes the washing of the offender's mouth with soap and a few Islamic demerits. Naturally, all infidels should be forewarned not to expect a response when they say, "Hey, Abu. What have you been eating, man?"