Smoking Ban Makes Odors Noticeable

(Dunfermline, Scotland) An unintended consequence of banning smoking in Scottish pubs is that now people can be offended by other substances in the air -- uh, like flatulence. However, instead of banning the act of breaking wind, proprietors are banning the perpetrators.

Management at the bar say Stewart Laidlaw "revels" in his bouts of flatulence and other punters have almost been sick after exposure to the foul smells.

Mr Laidlaw (35), who is furious at the ban by Thirsty Kirsty's, is thought to be the first person in West Fife to be barred for breaking wind.

The James Street pub's owner says the stench has become unbearable since Scotland's smoking ban came in last year but suspects drinkers could have been breathing in the waft for years before without noticing it.

Note that, in this story, we have an entirely new definition of "reveler." I also suspect that the Dunfermline Press might be confronted with a scarcity of newsworthy local stories since it devoted about 2,500 words to this farts in a bar piece. Nevertheless, it is interesting to know that lighting up a smoke makes everybody's farts smell okay.

Tip: Charlie Nestor