Now The Germans Are Packing Substandard Equipment!

According to the European Union, which found that:

German penises 'too small for EU condoms.'

The Germans are saying the EU has overestimated the average penis size by almost twenty percent and they are taking action to prove it. They are going to measure and want all the other EU countries to do the same. Their contention is that the entire male population has the same average schwanz. Some folks have said that this is not the only subject area where the EU has an inflated opinion.

Urologist Gunther Hagler, head of the team compiling the research, said: "By checking hundreds of patients we found German penises were too small for standard EU condoms. "On average they were 14.48 cms long and 3.95 cms wide. That makes them much smaller than the EU standard condom size of 17 cms in length and 5.6 cms in width." He denied the German man was any smaller than the rest of Europe, adding: "We think the EU has got its sums wrong, and if other countries were to check out their men's assets they would find the EU has made a mistake in its calculations.

This article from Gene Expression is very funny and worth a look. The comment thread that follows is equally hilarious.

As an aside, rumor has it that the newly elected Episcopal Bishop of New Hampshire, Gene Robinson, upon learning of the massive European penis measuring project, has stated that he and some of his fellow believers would gladly be available to assist as needed.