I Am Ozzy and You're F&%#&^!

Weathered rock icon Ozzy Osbourne has written a book, I Am Ozzy, available here.

Through an anonymous source, I received a bootleg copy of the introduction to the book which explains the reasons Osbourne wrote it.

"Ya' f#$^&, a&#@ can eat ma b#%@& f yer the don't. Ma c&#%$ fins tah f$##&, and din f^&$# mer. Nah git an g$#%&&^ by. Day muffin f%$#^*# kisser ok g&$%# and s$%#&."

Fill in the blanks and enjoy a fine read, I'm guessing. It helps if one understands Ozzyspeak.

Interestingly, it's hinted that Osbourne wants the book made into a movie starring Johnny Depp.