Rectal Shoplifter




(Prerov, Czech Republic) A man attempted to shoplift a digital music player by hiding it where the sun don't shine.

The thief was caught when the shoplifting alarm rang loud and proud at the supermarket he had entered in the town of Prerov.

Nabbed by staff, he was found to have a pair of earphones stashed in his slacks.

Yet the earphones had no alarm-system tag. What had cause the bell to ring? Searching the man more thoroughly, security guards uncovered a tube of lube in his pocket.

You can see where this is going, can't you?

Yes, the presence of the slidey, glidey substance prompted an intimate inspection of certain nooks and crannies - and thus the missing music player came to light, local tabloid iDnes reports.

Frankly, this story is hard to believe.