California to Evacuate Livestock

(Sacramento, California) Leading the world in nanny state initiatives, California is planning for emergency evacuation of pets and livestock in the event of a natural calamity. Last I checked, though, emergency planners haven't mastered the task of evacuating people yet. Maybe cows will be easier.

Since pets and livestock are property, the California legislature has expanded the scope of emergency planners' responsibilities to include not only the lives of people but what they own. What's next? Evacuation plans for family heirlooms?

Frankly, I wonder how many trucks will be available to evacuate Farmer Smith's cattle and Rancher Jones' chickens? Where will the trucks be staged? How will they be maintained? And last but not least, where is the state going to shelter the cows and chickens and pigs during a, say, week-long flooding emergency? How will the livestock be fed? I believe the local high school and cafeteria won't be up to the task.

I'd recommend the California Statehouse be the designated livestock emergency evacuation shelter. The lawmakers could stack the steaming piles of manure adjacent to the odious reems of pending legislation. Of course, they would have to be extra careful to annotate each properly for fear of getting them accidentally interchanged.

Obviously, lawmakers in California believe that the public needs more taxes. Open your wallets, Golden Staters. The Assembly passed the proposed measure 79-1.

Companion post at Diggers Realm.