Herman Kopke - Rest in Peace

The story of Herman Kopke caught my eye and seemed worthy of passing on. Prior to his death last week, Kopke was believed to be Nebraska's oldest living man. Born in 1895, he was 108 years old. In addition to hard work, good genes and an active mind, Kopke's longevity was also influenced by a lifetime of smoking tobacco and eating pork. According to his son-in-law, LaVerne Lamprecht of Fremont, Neb., "he'd eat pork chops and cut off the fat around them, and he'd smear (the fat) on the bread and eat it."

It's expected that the data associated with Mr. Kopke's longevity will be excluded from the annoying lifestyle studies performed to frighten the public into smoking and eating grass.

Services for Herman Kopke were held last Saturday in Elkhorn, Nebraska.

Stetson Hat Plant Closing

(St. Joseph, MO) According to this story, the Stetson hat manufacturing plant in St. Joseph is closing in June with a loss of 110 jobs. Officials for Hatco Inc. made the announcement. The reason for the closure is poor sales. People are just not wearing hats like they used to.

Since the loss of jobs cannot be attributed to outsourcing, the news was met without the usual glee by Democratic party operatives and labor union activists.

Liberal Talk Radio Silenced in LA & Chicago

From a report in the Chicago Tribune:

After just two weeks of broadcasting, Air America Radio, the fledgling liberal talk-radio network featuring Al Franken and Janeane Garofalo, was pulled off the air Wednesday morning in Chicago and Los Angeles in a payment dispute that shows no sign of quick resolution.

Arthur Liu, owner of Multicultural Radio Broadcasting Inc., which owns Air America affiliates WNTD-950 AM in Chicago and KBLA-1580 AM in Los Angeles, said Air America bounced a check and owes him more than $1 million. Air America and Multicultural had entered into an agreement in which the network essentially was renting Multicultural's airtime, Liu said.

"They bounced a check today," Liu said. "It's a default. They have paid only a very small portion of what they owe us."

It appears that the dispute between Multicultural and Air America includes some contractual considerations that may have to be resolved by the courts. If so, there could be a significant delay prior to final resolution, and, in the interim, the second and third largest radio markets in the nation will be without Air America.

I suspect that the problems Air America is having are the result of inadequate planning and preparation on the part of the backers and producers. In a cliche, "The hurrier we go, the behinder we get."

Puppy Killer Gets Prison

(Santa Cruz, CA) Steven David Jackson, 39, was convicted of animal cruelty for killing a puppy with a golf club. As a result, Judge Art Danner sentenced him to one year in prison, three years probation, $2,000 restitution, mandatory anger management counseling, and 500 hours community service.

In his defense, Jackson contended that he didn't mean to harm the puppy, stating that he was only preventing the dog from biting his son. Prosecutor Gordon Isen disagreed, indicating that there was clear intent to kill.

"Not only is Mr. Jackson a continuing threat to our community, people across the world are watching what happens today," said Isen, who received hundreds of letters urging full prosecution of Jackson. "We need to tell others that Santa Cruz County won't accept this type of behavior."

Sheesh! "People across the world are watching what happens today" might be exaggerating the importance of the decision. I wasn't watching. In fact, I only found it when I was looking for something totally unrelated. Nonetheless, the County Prosecutor thinks the case is important world news and, as such, Steven Jackson is being punished harshly.

My take is in the form of advice. If you kick your dog or blend puppies, don't spend a lot of time in Santa Cruz. The "world is watching."

Child Molester Free on Technicality

(Santa Ana, CA) Serial child molester Edward Harvey Stokes has been released from jail in California and is reported to have left the state.

Stokes was first arrested in 1974 and had been convicted at least five times in Washington and Oregon on rape, sodomy and kidnapping charges. In July 1995, he completed a three-year sentence in Oregon for sex abuse and sodomy.

According to police and court records, Stokes targeted runaways and other troubled youth because they typically did not tell authorities. He often gave his victims alcohol and drugs, with some victims waking up in handcuffs and leg shackles.

The 4th District Court of Appeals ruled that Stokes should be released from his life prison sentence because he never had a chance to confront his accuser, a teenager who committed suicide.

This makes me sick. Somewhere in the US, Edward Harvey Stokes, who has admitted to molesting over 200 children, is right now working on another victim, ruining another child's life.

Chicago Hires Felon, Grants Leave to Serve Prison Term

According to this story, William Schneider, 34, was hired by the Public Building Commission of Chicago while under federal indictment for stealing more than $100,000 from his previous employer. Two months later, Schneider was convicted and sentenced to federal prison. To serve his time, he requested and was granted a leave of absence from his job in finance. Fortunately, he wasn't paid by the city while he was in prison.

Officials have pleaded ignorance and are trying to figure out how he was hired for key accounting positions despite a felony conviction for financial fraud. Oddly, some records seem to have been lost.

Does this episode surprise anyone?

Hat tip: The Chicago Report

Weekly Linkfests

The April 12th Edition of the Carnival of the Capitalists is up at The Chicago Report.

The Carnival of the Vanities is posted at BoiFromTroy along with a guided tour of West Hollywood, California.

Reverend Pixy is warming cockles with the Bonfire of the Vanities at Ambient Irony.

The BEST OF ME SYMPHONY is at Blogo Slovo by Dave.

Illegals Being Arrested

(Montgomery, Alabama) Alabama State Troopers have been empowered by the Department of Homeland Security to arrest and detain illegal aliens. Using the "Immigration Law Handbook," troopers "have arrested 106 illegal immigrants, including a Mexican man driving 90 miles per hour and a Mexican mother of two who presented invalid documents while applying for a driver's license."

Alabama is the epicenter of a widening effort by the Department of Homeland Security to encourage states and localities to help enforce immigration laws in the aftermath of the Sept. 11 attacks.

Colorado, Idaho and Virginia are considering following the examples of Alabama, which began its partnership with the Department of Homeland Security in September, and Florida, which signed an agreement with federal officials in 2002. In Los Angeles County, the sheriff's office is close to an agreement to allow booking officers to identify illegal immigrants in county jails for deportation.

I happen to be in full support of arresting and prosecuting lawbreakers and illegal aliens are lawbreakers. Unfortunately, this action may be too little, too late and it won't have any substantive impact whatsoever as long as the borders remain porous. Nonetheless, when the leftists hear what's happening, I think we can expect a political firestorm.

Having said all that, I still applaud the action. It may be a baby step, but it's in the right direction.

Companion post at eTALKINGHEAD.

University Blood Drive Controversy

(Columbia, MO) This type of stunt makes me angry. A University of Missouri sorority blood drive coordinator urged members to lie about their health to qualify as donors.

"I don't care if you got a tattoo last week - LIE," Gamma Phi Beta blood donation coordinator Christie Key said in a Tuesday e-mail to about 170 sorority sisters. "I don't care if you have a cold. Suck it up. We all do. LIE. Recent peircings (sic)? LIE. Even if you're going to use the 'Do Not Use My Blood' sticker, GIVE ANYWAY."

Citing the risk of spreading Hepatitis B, the Red Cross prohibits those who've had tattoos or piercings in the past year from donating blood. And it encourages people who are sick to avoid giving.

One recipient of the e-mail who is not a member of Gamma Phi Beta forwarded the message to the Columbia Missourian.

Authorities are considering disciplinary action against Christie Key. Hopefully, it will be more than a slap on the hand.

Saving the Whales

Call me flummoxed. We've been saving the whales for so many years that I thought they were saved. But, noooo! Apparently, more saving is needed and Wal-Mart is being targeted to make it happen. According to this story, the Environmental Investigation Agency (EIA), The Humane Society of the United States (HSUS) and Greenpeace are calling on Wal-Mart to influence the Japanese grocer Seiyu to not sell whale meat and stop the Japanese public from eating it.

Since the Japanese have been hunting whales and eating whale meat for hundreds, maybe thousands, of years, it's probably unrealistic to expect an American retailer to have any substantive impact.

Greenies Targeting Cell Phones

It's probably because cell phones are not part of the "natural" world that various environmental groups are trying to get them banned on public lands. Or maybe, they're just an annoyance. Either way, the greenies want action. According to celebrity leftist, Jim Hightower,

"How many of you want to go to a National Park to hear cell phones in the wild? Confront your congress critters on this - write, call, or ask in person why Congress okayed this pollution of the people's parks."

The Public Employees for Environmental Responsibility (PEER) has already accused the National Park Service (NPS) of malfeasance for not requiring an environmental assessment for the erection of cell towers in the wilderness. The apparent goal is to prevent any cell towers from being built in or around public lands. In a valid response, the NPS has stated that cell phones provide public safety communications during emergencies requiring life-saving assistance.

My take is that cell phones can truly be an annoyance. However, I don't think that freedoms in America should be taken away just because some people are annoyed. I also believe that the action by the environmentalists is only a small initiative in their overall campaign to outlaw everything that annoys them in society. I'm convinced that the greenies won't be satisfied until all people eat organic vegetables, the automobile is outlawed, all animals have rights, all electricity comes from the sun and wind, and everybody lives happily ever after frolicking among the wildflowers in the beautiful meadows of Mother Earth.

Stay tuned. You'll be hearing more about this in the future.

Total Ban on Plastic Bags Proposed

(Via NEWS.com.au) Correct me if I'm wrong, but, around twenty years ago, didn't the environmental crowd whoop and holler about the use of paper bags in society causing the destruction of "millions of tree?" There was a massive effort to get businesses, government and private citizens to switch to using plastic bags in lieu of the wasteful paper bags. And many did.

Well, times change and now some activists consider the plastic bags as causing significant harm to the environment because they are not being recycled and end up in landfills. Get ready for the Greenies to get a total ban on plastic bags in Australia.

World's Oldest Mouse

According to lifespan researchers at the University of Michigan Medical School, a dwarf mouse has lived the equivalent of 136 human years. It was accomplished through genetic engineering by specific modification of the pituitary and thyroid glands and reduced insulin production.

Hopefully, the research will lead to something other than old mice.

Radical Cheerleaders

This is news to me.

The Radical Cheerleaders, a loose network of young, mostly female activists, have put a new face on protest. Using the same moves performed by a high school pep squad, they've heckled for livable wages at an Alabama Taco Bell, chanted anti-war rhymes on Boston Common and marched in the Saskatchewan Pride Parade.

"We do for our fellow activists what cheerleaders do for sports players: we get people going," said Betsy Housten, 24, of the New York City Radical Cheerleaders.

My personal take is that I'm happy about this evolution in activism. As cheerleaders, these females more than likely will attempt to look like females which deviates from their normal gender-neutral personae. I welcome the change.

SUV Kills Baby

(Wenatchee, WA) Okay, guess what's wrong with this story from the Seattle Post-InsulterIntelligencer.

Baby dies after SUV swerves into river
A sport utility vehicle carrying a woman and her infant daughter ran off U.S. Route 2 into the Wenatchee River early yesterday. The mother swam to shore, but the child died.

Emergency medical workers tried for 3 1/2 hours to revive 6-week-old Kaya Sterner, who was in the cold water for about 48 minutes before being pulled out just after 7 a.m., State Patrol Trooper Rich Magnussen said.

The baby was pronounced dead in Central Washington Hospital.

Well hidden, a couple of paragraphs down, is the fact that somebody was driving the evil SUV. However, it should be quite apparent that the leftist newspaper wants its readers to be left with the impression that the SUV was at fault.

Drunk Job Applicant

(Orchards, Washington) Here's a bonehead report by John Branton from The Columbian. While drunk, Robert A. Gulley stopped by Washington State Patrol headquarters in Orchards to apply for a job as a trooper.

"I guarantee he's not going to get a job with us," Trooper Garvin March said after Gulley was stopped while driving away from the patrol office and ticketed for alleged drunken driving. "We've arrested drunks in unexpected ways and places before, but this one just blew me away," said March, a 26-year veteran.

Doofus!

Kerry Gets Served

From a story in USAToday, bloggers have targeted Sen. John Waffles Kerry for google bombing.

The brains behind the waffles stunt is Ken Jacobson, a Duquesne University Law School student. He started the waffles campaign on April 3, when he first posted a blog he calls Esoteric*Diatribe (www .esoteric-diatribe.blogspot.com), which he writes on a personal computer in his Pittsburgh apartment.

"It's political fun and a bit sophomoric," says Jacobson, 23, a native of Canfield, Ohio. "But I believe George W. Bush is a man of conviction and a man of his word. I can't say the same for Sen. Kerry."

"Waffles," Jacobson says, "isn't as mean as 'miserable failure' but says something about what many people feel about Kerry," who Republicans say is a political chameleon. Jacobson says he has had no contact with the Bush campaign. The Kerry campaign had no comment about his effort.

It seems the Waffles campaign has achieved significant notoriety in a very short time. Congratulations to Ken Jacobson for being noticed by the major media.

Ex-Convicts and Homelessness

(Cleveland, OH) Yesterday, the Cleveland Plain Dealer carried a story about a problem facing homeless shelters in the city. Specifically, due to growth in the homeless population, men have to be bussed to another location in the city at a cost of $200 per day. The service is provided using one bus making three trips to carry a total of 150 men. Most interesting about the story is the reason given for the increase in the homeless population.

Last year, the Ohio Supreme Court ordered the parole board to stop classifying prisoners based on their indicted offenses instead of the crimes for which they were convicted. Hundreds more men were released as a result.

Sara Simila, head of the Ohio Adult Parole Authority, said men released from prison need a place to go if they don't have a home.

Most halfway houses have a waiting list. Sending them to shelters for the homeless is a last resort.

"It's a statewide epidemic," Simila said.

It is rare to see a news report that reveals the fact that a significant percentage of the homeless are ex-convicts. Year after year, the media presents the public with pluck-your-heartstrings stories of homeless women with children and homeless wheelchair-bound veterans. However, contrary to the image generally portrayed by the media, the Plain Dealer exposes the fact that the homeless population has a significant nucleus of convicted felons on parole.

It's refreshing to see some honesty from the media.

Officer Wins Malicious Prosecution Case

(Virginia Beach, VA) A bicycle officer was accused of scratching Joseph F. Seeley's car while writing a ticket at the Oceanfront in August. Circuit Judge Stephen C. Mahan, ruling in a malicious prosecution lawsuit, disagreed and awarded Seeley to pay Officer Christopher T. Willis $25,000 in compensatory damages and $25,000 in punitive damages.

Bully!

Dead Dogs Don't Bark

(Galesburg, IL) This story is from a recent press release.

Detective Carlson parked in the driveway of 1400 Lindsey Lane and exited his vehicle and began walking towards the door of the residence when his attention was drawn directly across the street to the sound of a barking dog. The dog was a large Pit Bull. The dog had emerged between a pine tree and 1401 Lindsey Lane and was running and barking towards Carlson. When the dog got to within 5 feet of Carlson, he was sure he was about to be bitten so Carlson turned so that his backside would be towards the dog. The dog then bit several times at the back of Carlson�s legs and then made contact with the back part of Carlson�s right knee, puncturing the skin. The dog then ran towards the street and charged at Carlson again. Detective Carlson then drew his service weapon, a Glock model 22, and began to talk calmly to the dog. The dog then approached the front of Carlson, and then ran back across the street. Carlson immediately called 911 from his cell phone and requested assistance from an animal control officer. A red pickup truck drove by and the dog ran after the truck, barking all the while. Carlson attempted to walk to the front door of 1400 Lindsey Lane and the dog focused his attention to Carlson and charged at him again. Carlson stood there in the front yard and took aim at the dog and when the dog was at point blank range Carlson fired one shot into the dog�s head at a downward angle to insure there would be no ricochet. The animal stopped instantly and fell onto his left side.

It seems to me that Detective Nick Carlson exercised appropriate restraint, more than many would.

Could Not Be Said Better

I found the following posted by Kim over at The G Spot.

"Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington? Also they track her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. I think the solution is to give every illegal alien a cow."

As irony, this works. However, in application, we all know it wouldn't. Cows are property and there's an economic incentive to keeping accurate records of property. People are not property and over 600,000 Americans died in a war deciding that issue.

Victoria's Secret Nixes Fashion Show

(Columbus, OH) As a result of complaints, Victoria's Secret announced yesterday that it is dropping this year's nationally televised holiday fashion show. The groups complained about the nubile young women prancing to erotic music in stiletto heels while wearing skimpy thongs and uplifting bras made of sheer, shimmery material. For the sake of full disclosure, I'm not a member of any of these groups.

Guns Found in Schoolyard

(Flint, MI) According to this story, children hunting for Easter eggs yesterday found two loaded handguns on the grounds of Gundry Elementary School.

It would seem prudent for school administrators to conduct periodic walkthroughs of their schoolyards.

Call Me Curious

For some reason, I've been unable to publish anything since about 4pm yesterday and I don't have any idea why. Does anybody know?

Also, the MuNu folks seem to be implementing some sort of targeted program of exclusivity which involves culling their blogrolls based on nonspecific criteria. I'm really in the dark as to the reason and purpose. A clear explanation would be nice.

PETA Backs Down

The animal rights extremists at PETA planned on producing an ad that unintentionally upset Bruce Springsteen.

The ad is a send-up of the 1984 album Born in the USA with the famous cover image of Springsteen's denimed behind, but PETA's version shows a big bottom with what is unaffectionately known as repairman cleavage and the tag line: "Obese in the USA."

"The ad was intended to parody the sad shape a meat-addicted America has taken since this classic album came out two decades ago," PETA execs wrote in a memo. "But Mr. Springsteen's management felt that people might think we are spoofing Bruce himself, which was never the case."

Interesting. PETA has succeeded in being outrageous enough to anger one of its supporters. More people need to stand up to PETA, in particular, when they terrorize children.

It also should be noted that Bruce Springsteen appears to be pretty sensitive about his behind.

Prepaid Gift Cards

For years, retailers have offered customers the ability to pay on account for their products and receive gift certificates or cards. This method of retailing has been widely popular and successful and hasn't gone unnoticed by major financial institutions. Since late 2002, major credit providers, VISA, Mastercard, American Express, and others have entered the prepaid gift card market with great results. Last year alone, according to one estimate, sales through gift cards were $30 billion, and this figure is expected to grow to $73 billion by 2007. Another estimate places last year's sales at $45 billion with a projection of $90 billion by 2007.

With new applications and new users, the market for stored value plastic cards is expected to continue at double-digit growth rates for the foreseeable future. Although it has a short history, the current realm of gift cards, re-loadable personal spending cards, prepaid gift cards, and travel cards appears to have an enduring future. Travel cards, for instance, are projected to make inroads into the $30 billion traveler check market.

However, the gift card story is not all positive. On the down side is the fact that not all prepaid gift cards are the same and there are major differences between retailer-issued and bank-issued gift cards.

When it comes to measuring bank gift cards against retail gift cards, possibly the greatest difference is that financial institutions have global acceptance at over 30 million merchants and that all the rights and protection afforded to credit cards are applicable to their prepaid products. These include chargeback rights, dispute management and "zero liability" protection if a card is lost or stolen. These are rights typically not afforded consumers purchasing or receiving retailer-issued gift cards. Furthermore, the residual value of bank issued cards never expires.

Since the phenomenon of gift cards is relatively new, many rights and protections are not clear. Therefore, it is the subject of proposed legislation in a number of jurisdictions. As examples, the issues of fees, devaluation, purchasers' rights, and expiration limits are under consideration in Florida, Hawaii, South Carolina, and Georgia.

In summary, prepaid gift cards are a growing and dynamic influence in the economy and lawmakers across the nation are scurrying to produce adequate legislation. Stay tuned.

Medicare Card Scam

With the Medicare discount drug program going into effect in June, scam artists are taking advantage of ill-informed and gullible citizens by selling them phony Medicare discount cards.

"There have been reports across the country of people going either door-to-door or calling on the phone selling 'Medicare-approved' discount drug cards. Well, they're all scams. In fact it's illegal to sell any Medicare product over the phone or door-to-door," said Mandy Walker, Consumer Reports.

Caveat emptor. Tell others.

Another Animal Hoarder

(Popular Bluff, Missouri) According to a report by Lindsay Cummings in the Daily American Republic, the Butler County Sheriff's Department and the Humane Society of Missouri removed 50 to 70 dogs from the home of a female animal hoarder.

"She has been given numerous chances to rectify the situation," said Butler County Sheriff Deputy Cindy Bayer. "We talked to her last week and told her she would have to do something. Many of the dogs had no water, no food and were living in mud puddles. Her house is full of urine and feces from the dogs living there. It is so bad she is not even sure how many dogs are in there."

The dogs were chained to trees, cars and old gas tanks. Many were kept inside the woman's house, in what investigators with the humane society called deplorable conditions.

"The air in the house is thick to breath because of the pet dander and dust," said one investigator, who wished to remain anonymous. "The floor is covered with fur and the rooms are dark and damp from the amount of animals housed in there."

The woman has a history of animal hoarding in Missouri and Florida and may be charged with animal cruelty in this latest incident. For some unknown reason, the name of the woman was withheld from the report.

Sadly, just like pedophilia, rehabilitation of animal hoarders is rarely successful.

Cleveland Rates Condi's Testimony

(Cleveland, OH) The local powerhouse AM radio station WTAM conducted a poll of their listeners' and asked if they thought that Condileeza Rice's appearance before congressional investigators was a political witch-hunt. The station reported that an overwhelming 87 percent said it was.

Trojan Horse for Mac OS X

The existence of a Trojan Horse that attacks Mac OS X has been known since March 20th, but it wasn't reported until yesterday. Called MP3Concept or MP3Virus.gen, the Trojan masquerades as an MP3 file. It hides in ID tags and activates when the user clicks to play a song.

The Trojan appears to be the first malicious code for Mac OS X, which was launched in March 2001.

Until now, Mac users have prided themselves on running a system that has been largely virus-free. Few Mac OS X users run antivirus software, or are wary of double-clicking files they've downloaded or received in e-mail.

That could change quickly. Nearly half of the executable files downloaded through Kazaa contain malicious code like viruses and Trojan horses, according to a recent study by security firm TruSecure. Out of 4,778 files downloaded in one month for the study, nearly half contained various types of nefarious code.

Mac users are cautioned not to open email attachments unless they were expected. More malicious code is expected in the future to specifically target Mac machines.

Abstinence Stops HIV Spread

According to this story, leading HIV experts say that more effort needs to be devoted to encouraging committed relationships among HIV infected people to control spread of the disease. They believe that there would be no global AIDS pandemic without widespread promiscuity. To address the AIDS issue, the experts are promoting fewer sex partners, condom usage, and, very importantly, abstinence.

Of note is the importance placed on abstinence by the experts (which include officials from the Global Fund for Aids, the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation and the US Agency for International Development). Oddly, it's considered necessary to push abstinence throughout the globe but the experts surely won't advocate the program in the United States. Promoting abstinence in America carries a guarantee of being ridiculed in a firestorm of controversy. The experts would be subjected to vicious personal attacks and labeled as a right-wing extremists.

What's most curious is that the people who advocate abstinence in other countries are generally the same people who vigilantly refuse to allow discussion of the subject in the United States. Consider it another dichotomy demonstrating the hypocrisy of the political left.

Group Blogs

Regarding group blogs, there's an interesting post and an even more interesting comment thread over at The Spoons Experience. The general consensus seems to be that, with a few notable exceptions, group blogs customarily are less appealing to the reader than individual blogs. I personally believe that it's quite ambitious to make grand generalizations about any particular aspect of the blogosphere since there are an infinite number of things going on simultaneously. And, what's successful and appealing today may be the exact opposite tomorrow.

It's also important to consider the purpose of the group blog in any assessment. If the purpose is to attract the most readers, assessing the blog is simple. Look at the counter. However, if there are other important motivations for the group blog and traffic is a secondary consideration, it becomes more difficult to evaluate.

Since I'm a regular contributor to a group blog, eTALKINGHEAD, my comments probably reflect a some bias. Nevertheless, group blogs are popular and any discussion of relative strengths and weaknesses is worthwhile. To read or to join in, visit Spoons.

John Kerry - Waffle Maker

(Today's Google Bomb) When pressed, when official, when flippant, and when casual, it's virtually impossible to pinpoint exactly what John Kerry will say or do at any one time. The Democrat's waffles on issues are so frequent that waffles could be used as part of the description on a missing persons report.

Hat tip: Esoteric-Diatribe

The Origin of Snakes

(State College, PA) Contrary to the widely held belief that the origin of snakes is closely related to the curriculum at law schools, two researchers at Penn State University, Professor Blair Hedges and postdoctoral scholar Nicolas Vidal, have found genetic evidence that strongly suggests snakes actually evolved from land-dwelling lizards.

Executive in Motor Vehicle Dept. Downloaded Porn

(Columbus, Ohio) According to a report by the Ohio State Inspector General, the Executive Director of the Ohio Board of Motor Vehicle Collision Repair Registration, Jack Lundberg, has allegedly subscribed to pornographic Web sites and downloaded more than 100 pornographic images and videos on his state computer.

Lundberg has to be extremely delusional if he thinks that his activities on a government computer network are private. What a bonehead. By the way, he just happens to be married to Ohio Supreme Court Justice Evelyn Lundberg Stratton. I'm sure she's absolutely thrilled about this news.

[UPDATE] Jack Lundberg resigned. Justice Evelyn Lundberg Stratton says she doesn't know anything because she doesn't live with her husband.

Frequent Sexual Intercourse Prevents Prostate Cancer

Recent medical research has found that eating garlic, scallions, onions, leeks, and chives on a daily basis provides significant protection against the development of prostate cancer.

More recently, a study by the National Cancer Institute has found that increasing the frequency of sexual intercourse decreases the risk of prostate cancer.

Therefore, the most prudent method of minimizing prostate cancer risk is to eat a lot of garlic and frequently have sexual intercourse. Unfortunately, those two things seem to be mutually exclusive.

Biker Gang Members Sentenced

In Montreal, Superior Court Justice Pierre Beliveau sentenced nine members of the Hells Angels motorcycle gang to jail terms ranging from 10 to 22 years on charges of drug trafficking, gangsterism and conspiracy to commit murder.

Meanwhile, in Toledo, 14 members of the Outlaws Motorcycle Club are on trial in U.S. District Court on a variety of charges including racketeering based on acts such as murder and drug dealing.

I'd write more, but these guys are known to carry a grudge forever.

Horse Rapist Walks Free

According to this story from the Netherlands, a man who raped horses was able to walk free because there is no specific law banning sexual intercourse with pets and livestock. Also, grounds were established that the horses had not physically suffered from the rapes. In response to complaints about the incident, Dutch Agriculture Minister Cees Veerman has proposed legislation to make all forms of bestiality illegal.

One would expect that the banning of bestiality in a civilized society would be based on ethical, moral, and medical reasons, however, in the Netherlands, this is not the case. The Dutch lawmakers believe sex with animals should be illegal because pets and livestock are unable to give or withhold their consent. Therefore, bestiality is nonconsensual sex.

As bizarre and troublesome as this story seems, it becomes more so when one considers that devices are being manufactured which allow people to communicate with their pets. A dog barking translator is already on the market and devices for other species are sure to follow. It's not inconceivable to imagine a person recording a conversation with his pretty French Poodle, Fifi, to provide evidence of consent to their sexual relations.

From an economic perspective, there also may be a noticeable increase in demand for doggie treats in the Netherlands.

Hat tip: Right ToThe Point

Concealed Weapons Legal in Ohio

To obtain a concealed-carry permit, an Ohio resident (at least 45 days) must be 21 years old, be fingerprinted, undergo firearms training and a background check, and pay $45 to the county sheriff. The law is effective today and about 100,000 Ohioans are expected to apply for permits in the next six months.

Business owners have started to put up signs designating their establishments are gun-free zones. It's not clear which individuals the signs are intended to inform, the permit-holders or the criminals. A prudent criminal would probably target places he knew were unprotected.

Porn Website at Indiana University

(Bloomington, Indiana) An Indiana University freshman student named Keira is posting topless and semi-nude pictures on her website to earn money for college expenses. The adult website is reported to originate from her dormitory room on the school's Bloomington campus. According to this story, the Office of Student Ethics will meet with Dean of Students Richard McKaig to determine whether to pursue an investigation into unauthorized use of the University's name or space. Keira faces possible probation or expulsion.

In my research, I found the website's content to be fairly tame as pornography and it's probably overpriced at $25 per month. However, from a public image perspective, university officials would be wise find a way to put distance between the site of higher learning and the site of prurient pandering. Of course, since IU has been voted the "Best Party School" by the Princeton Review, maybe pornography is a welcome addition to their overall recruiting program.

[Update 4/16/04] Keira just now appeared on the Bill O'Reilly cable news program. It was revealed that her real name is September Harness and nobody has bothered her because she's been in the news recently. O'Reilly expressed a tsk, tsk attitude towards her.

Commercial Harp Seal Hunting

With an estimated 5.2 million harp seals in the North Atlantic being blamed for diminishing codfish stocks and with a renewed demand for harp seal fur, the Canadian government is allowing 1 million seals to be commercially harvested in the next three years. Naturally, animal rights groups from everywhere are outraged.

"This slaughter that everyone thinks has disappeared is back with a vengeance," said Rebecca Aldworth, an antihunt advocate with the International Fund for Animal Welfare.

A majority of the seals killed are under a month old, she said, and, "at that age, the seals haven't eaten their first solid foods and have not learned to swim so they have no escape from the hunters."

Aldworth and other animal activists also complain that the seals are not killed in a humane manner.

"We filmed and witnessed seals being skinned alive right in front of us," . . . .

"We saw live seals being dragged while conscious across the ice with boat hooks, we saw stockpiles of dead and dying seals, it was really horrific."

Pretty gruesome image, eh? Perhaps if they harvested the baby seals as they were being born, it would be more acceptable. A frequently used method is to wait for the baby seal's head to come out of the mother's body, then they crush the skull and suck the brains out using a vacuum. It seems that most liberal activists support this type of tissue extraction. Otherwise, the public will just have to get used to the media regularly inserting sensational news footage of those cute baby harp seals being clubbed to death.

Shark Kills Surfer

(Maui, Hawaii) Yesterday, about 300 yards off Kahana Beach on Maui's western shore, surfer Willis McInnis, 57, was attacked by a shark and died.

In a somewhat related story, on Sunday, 22-year-old blond-haired, green-eyed, Courtney Marcher told friends she was going surfing on Oahu's North Shore and disappeared.

Everything I've read tells me that shark attacks are rare occurrences. Not rare enough for my liking.

[Update 4/9/04] The life of Willis "Will" McInnis may have been saved if a tourniquet had been applied expeditiously according to a newspaper report. The shark attacked more than once and severed the femoral artery which caused McInnis to bleed to death.

There's updated information on the disappearance of Courtney Marcher. Her surfboard was found in good condition by two fishermen about three miles off Kaena Point, 18 miles from where she was last seen. Current speculation is that she ran into trouble while in the water and she is not a victim of foul play.

A Liberal Reviews Air America

San Antonio writer and activist Justin Felux provides some observations about Air America Radio in the Alternative Press Review. His take is that the programming is produced by white people for white people and it's trending towards being a complete turn-off to minorities. Other reviewers have used the words 'disappointing' and 'boring.' Here's an excerpt from Felux.

Sadly, it seems that nothing will be there to balance the utter whiteness of the network's format. Considering that the Democratic Party would be a political nonentity without the support of black voters, the fact that they are shut out and marginalized at every turn is beyond insulting. Air America Radio is just another episode in a long history of callous indifference and clueless misunderstanding the Democratic Party and white liberals in general have shown toward the black community. White liberals need to wake up and realize that this sort of business isn't going to cut it any longer, and black liberals need to speak up loudly and let them know it. Refusing to tune in to Air America Radio would be a good place to start. I know I won't be.

After only a week, Felux's and other initial reviews of Air America have to be an embarrassment for the liberal pundits who were ebullient with optimism prior to launch.

My perspective is that it seems the singular mannerism that is common among all the producers and players involved with Air America is anger at and hatred for conservatism. Historically, anger and hatred seldom contribute to entertainment value. And, without entertainment, Air America won't have an audience.

Hat tip: Instapundit

Dumb Smugglers Stopped for Speeding

Mary Lou Herrera and Peter Valazquez of Tucson, AZ, were stopped for speeding on Interstate 80 by Illinois State Police and found to be carrying 155 pounds of marijuana in their U-Haul truck. They've been charged with unlawful possession with intent to deliver and face a possible 6 to 30-year prison term if convicted.

I wonder how many bonehead convicts complain that they're doing 30 years for speeding or a broken taillight.

Eating Live Worms Treats Bowel Inflammation

Scientists at the University of Iowa have discovered that the introduction of live pig whipworms into the digestive system can be an effective treatment for inflammatory bowel disorders like Crohn's disease and ulcerative colitis.

"With our new impressive results, we can come out of the closet," said Dr. Joel Weinstock, a gastroenterologist at the University who has developed the treatment.

There used to be a time when finding worms in the closet meant it was time to clean it, not announce it.

Wal-Mart Loses Ballot Issue in Inglewood, CA

Tally up a victory for the unions. The ballot measure which would have allowed Wal-Mart to build a shopping center in the center of town was defeated. Unfortunately, the promises of 1,200 jobs being created and millions of dollars added to the tax base has been snuffed. Organized labor enlisted the support of anti-business environmentalists and welfare-state advocates, Jesse Jackson and Maxine Waters, to rally opposition to Wal-Mart.

Defeat of the ballot issue has to be considered an example of the hypocrisy of the leftists. They loudly complain about the lack of jobs while actively campaigning against creating any.

Weekly Linkfests - 4/5/04

Soundfury presents the Bonfire of the Vanities.

Ross White has nominated all entries for Oscars in the Carnival of the Vanities #81.

WOLves has the BestOfMe Symphony.

The Crazy Pundit has the April 5th edition of the Carnival of the Capitalists.

Child Porn Downloader Sentenced

(Cleveland, Ohio) According to this story, Robert Essex Jr. of Euclid admitted to using KaZaA, the online downloading system, to illegally transcribe music and child pornography onto compact discs. Cuyahoga County Common Pleas Court Judge Mary Jane Boyle sentenced Essex to two years in prison. Judge Boyle also classified Essex as a sexually oriented offender requiring him to register with the police after he is released from prison.

This 2-year sentence is somewhat troubling. Essex possessed video files with girls aged 6 to 14, and, according to Assistant Cuyahoga County Prosecutor Brenden Sheehan,

"The videos showed minor children engaged in hard-core sexual activity with adult males with titles like 'Child Lovers,' and 'Daddy & Me at 6.'"

Essex was also heavily involved in music piracy and bootlegging. Euclid Police Detective Sgt. James Baird stated that,

"The Recording Industry Association of America said it cost them more than $25,000 in sales."

Maybe it's just me, but, after only two years in prison, I don't see Essex doing anything differently and it really seems that he's a threat to kids. I'd be nervous about having him in any neighborhood with children.

Elecia Battle - Lottery Scammer

(South Euclid, Ohio) Lottery scammer Elecia Battle (See here for previous reporting) has agreed to a plea changing her previous 'not guilty' plea to 'no contest' with the understanding that she would be found guilty. Accordingly, Municipal Court Judge Patricia Ann Kleri imposed a fine of $1,000, ordered her to perform 50 hours of community service, and put her on one year of probation.

"I just want to say that I'm not a loser, I'm a winner. I have not been defeated. I'm victorious," Battle said. "I'm a winner after all."

Sure you are, Elecia. Just like you say. You're a winner, a real nice winner. Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Pothead Priest Richard Arko Pleads Guilty

(Summit County, Ohio) According to a story in the Akron Beacon Journal (reg. req'd), Richard Arko, former priest of the Prince of Peace Catholic Church, pleaded guilty today to cultivating marijuana and possession of criminal tools. Summit County Common Pleas Judge Patricia A. Cosgrove sentenced him to two years in prison then suspended the sentence and placed him on probation with random drug testing for two years. Arko was also ordered to perform 100 hours of community service. (See here for previous reporting on Richard Arko.)

In his defense, Arko contended he was growing the marijuana for medicinal purposes and looks forward to the legalization of the drug. Unfortunately, in addition to displaying a sinful disregard for Commandment No. 9, his statements seemed more to rationalize his crimes than to be gestures of contrition.

Chalk Richard Arko up as another statistic on the list of people who have ruined their lives through illegal drug use. Amen.

Lesbian & Bisexual Girls Smoke More

(Boston, MA) A study conducted by researchers at Children's Hospital Boston and Brigham and Women's Hospital in Boston indicates that lesbian and bisexual girls ages 12 to 17 were almost 10 times more likely to smoke compared to heterosexual girls of the same age. According to S. Bryn Austin, of Children's Hospital Boston,

"Antigay stigma and harassment, rejection from family, friends, peers and sometimes even physical violence can create a hostile environment for many young people coming to terms with their sexual orientation. This combined with the tobacco industry's targeted marketing to lesbian and gay communities is putting lesbian and bisexual girls in harm's way. We are concerned that these girls may be slipping under the radar screen when it comes to tobacco prevention efforts in schools and communities. More needs to be done to protect these girls and to address the social issues that may lead to their increased tobacco use."

So, the conclusion of the researchers is that the lesbian and bisexual girls are, in fact, doing the smoking, however, it's somebody else's fault. In this case, they blame social stigma and the tobacco companies.

Just for drill, using the same logic for assigning blame, isn't it possible to conclude that lesbianism causes smoking?

Soybeans Cure Baldness

Researchers are reporting that a molecule in soybeans may help cure baldness, prostate cancer and bad skin. But, there is a negative aspect. The molecule is a type of estrogen that is also believed to alleviate hot flashes, dry skin, fuzzy memory, and other annoying symptoms of menopause. The researchers specifically did not address the feminization of men nor the impact on their sexual function.

The good news is that men may now have a full, lustrous head of hair. The downside is that they may no longer care.

Chernobyl - 18 Years Later

Elena is a Ukrainian woman who lives about 130 kilometers from Chernobyl. She uses a camera, a notebook, and a motorcycle to collect information and photographs first-hand at the location of the world's worst nuclear reactor accident. Here's an excerpt from her photo journal website.

If I am in the Ghost Town just for a ride, then I go alone, but I never go alone inside of buildings. There are many places that not structurally safe, or have collected pockets of intense radiation. The other reason is wild boars, if you see one on the street, this is not a big deal, but to meet face to face inside of the building... I could become a dinner for a family of them.

When I explore buildings, I pick up a girl friend of mine who lives in Chernobyl, and is a professional guide for the dead zone. She is a native and highly literate in the field of atomic physics. She has a great personality and great taste in shoes. There are places where no one dares to go, not even scientists with protective gear. One such place is the Red Wood forest and another is the Ghost Town Cemetary. The relatives of the people who are buried there can not visit, because in addition to people, much of the radioctive graphite nuclear core is buried there. It is one of the most toxic places on earth. [sic, entire excerpt]

Elena's photographs are haunting. Her words are sobering. There are no people, nor barking dogs, in Ghost Town. Take a look.

Porn Sites Total 1.6 Million

(San Diego, CA) According to a study by Websense Inc., pornography websites have grown from 88,000 in 2000 to about 1,600,000 in 2004, more than a 17-fold increase. A major reason has been the growth in technology and, according to Harold Kester, chief technology officer of Websense,

"Offering employees unlimited broadband connectivity and access to streaming video is the equivalent of installing an adult theater on each desktop."

It's estimated that 37 percent of Internet-enabled workers have visited porn websites. I'll go out on a limb and guess that not all those visits were work-related.

Illegal Aliens Receive Rent Subsidies

(Washington, D.C.) Foreign nationals are flooding the United States illegally because they know they can find work and because they'll receive free health and education benefits immediately. And now, it seems they can also count on help with their rent. According to this story, in Arlington County, Virginia, and Montgomery County, Maryland, 2,500 rent-assistance grants worth more than $6 million are being doled out to illegal aliens every year.

The authorities say they check to see if everyone is a citizen by asking them. Well, guess what? They'll lie to you. They've already broken the law by entering illegally. What possible reason would there be for them to be honest to the stupid Americans? Am I wrong to view the actions of the illegals as theft from the American taxpayer?

With the recent ruling by the World Court which states that Mexicans charged with crimes in the US must have legal representation from Mexico, and the free health, free education, and now, rent subsidies, it sure seems like the illegals will soon have more rights and benefits than US citizens.

Companion post at eTALKINGHEAD.

Environmental Terrorist Michael Scarpitti Captured

(Victoria, British Columbia) Michael James Scarpitti, who prefers to be called Tre Arrow because the trees told him to change his name, is in jail in Canada for shoplifting. Coincidentally, he is also under indictment for environmental terrorism in the United States and wanted by the FBI. Scarpitti says "he will fight deportation to the United States." In the meantime, he is on a hunger strike in a Canadian jail to protest the US legal system. Let me repeat, he is on a hunger strike in a Canadian jail to protest the US legal system. Excuse me for having a mental block, but I cannot understand what he expects to accomplish, except maybe self-induced hunger pains.

Anyway, with all the current security concerns in the US and internationally, we would all be better off if this nutso was put away for a couple dozen years. He would stop running around setting fires with the real potential for loss of life and, at the same time, through an intimate relationship with cold prison walls, maybe they would tell him to take his cranium out of his rectum.

BBC Sunsets Cartoon Licensing to Snack Foods

(London, UK) The food police are celebrating another victory in Britain today with the announcement by the tax-funded BBC that it will no longer license its cartoon characters to snack food producers.

Teletubbies chocolate bars, Tweenies chocolate krispies and Fimbles shortcake are to be replaced with healthier products, like yoghurt with dried fruit and shaped pasta.

Oooh, yummy! Just wait, next they'll be forcing trail mix on everyone.

Mary Renouf of BBC Worldwide, the commercial arm of the BBC, said they tried to license unappealing snacks several years ago and it didn't work. So they've decided to stop licensing appealing snack food to force people into buying the cardboard flavored alternatives. The London-based Food Gestapo Commission applauded the BBC's action.

One has to wonder why socialism has to be forced on people if it's such a good deal.

Dee Laney, Insane Killer, Not Guilty

(Tyler, Texas) Deanna "Dee" Laney killed two of her sons and seriously injured a third through bludgeoning. She's not guilty because the devil made her do it. Now, there's talk about how she needs to get well so she can be released from the state mental hospital.

Two little boys are dead and the person who killed the boys can't be blamed because she had a wacky day. So now, Deanna Laney will get taxpayer funded room, board, and medical care and, when she's no longer wacky, released to society with hope that she won't have another wacky day. How sad is that?

Isn't it time to change the laws to allow a verdict of guilty but insane?

Wal-Mart Turns to Voters

(Inglewood, CA) After efforts by organized labor halted expansion plans, Wal-Mart sponsored a ballot initiative to have the citizens decide in Inglewood. Tomorrow, voters will determine if the company can build and operate a megastore and a number of chain shops in this city of 112,000. Interestingly, the ballot initiative will also exempt Wal-Mart from Inglewood's planning, zoning and environmental regulations. According to Peter Kanelos, of Wal-Mart's community affairs division,

"Organized labor is attempting to bully Wal-Mart and its customers."

Not so, says Madeline Janis-Aparicio, leader of a group formed to fight the Wal-Mart project.

"They are driving a Mack truck through California land use, planning and environmental law and trying to create a Wal-Mart government on this 60-acre site.

In a nutshell, it's environmental arguments against business expansion. Voters decide tomorrow.

Dog Barking Translator

(Tokyo, Japan) According to this story, the Japanese continue to be a world leader in innovative technology. The Takara Co. Ltd., has made the world's first dog-human translation machine. It's called Bowlingual and it translates dog barks into feelings. Kimiko Fukuda, who lives outside Tokyo, likes the machine, however, she says Bowlingual's Japanese translation seems perfect sometimes - and other times is totally wrong.

Doesn't sound all that reliable to me and I'd really like to know how many people in society are now arguing with their dogs, or, should I say, willing to admit it. By the way, for the cat lovers, Meowlingual should be available soon.

Fatherhood Crisis

It is well recognized that a fatherhood crisis exists in America and it is simplistically defined by the fact that millions of children are forced to grow up in fatherless households. I've been there, on both sides, as a child and as a noncustodial parent. My experience boils down to "Nobody wins!" Divorce in a family is pure devastation and the only hope is survival.

Via John Ray, I found an analysis of the fatherhood crisis prepared by Stephen Baskerville in The Independent Review. Here's the abstract:

Virtually every major social pathology has been linked to fatherless children: violent crime, drug and alcohol abuse, truancy, unwed pregnancy, suicide, and psychological disorders - all correlating more strongly with fatherlessness than with any other single factor. Tragically, however, government policies intended to deal with the "fatherhood crisis" have been ineffective at best because the root cause is not child abandonment by fathers but policies that give mothers an incentive to initiate marital separation and divorce.

I'm no longer a long distance dad since my children from my previous marriage are now adults. But I can easily recall the fifteen years of misery and heartache I experienced. Stephen Baskerville's piece is dead-on with respect to my experience and, I'm sure, many other dads.

The article is moderately long and necessarily so. The issues and complexities of a divorce with children involved are many and varied. However, take it from me, I would have felt a lot better having it available when I was going through the turmoil. At least, I would have understood all that was happening to me.

Schroeder Calls Outsourcing 'Unpatriotic'

Jobs are being outsourced from Germany. This is due to high labor costs, taxes, and the expensive and unnecessary environmental policies. Examples include telecommunications, tire manufacturing, and automobile supply, and, according to the Financial Times Deutschland, 70,000 jobs in the information technology sector alone were lost in Germany over the past year.

As a result, Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder expressed his concern and called the transfer of jobs to cheaper foreign locations "unpatriotic." This is curious since he can take some direct responsibility for the exceedingly high cost of doing business in Germany. In fact, the costly environmental regulations were imposed through the efforts of Schroeder's close political allies, the Greens.

I think it's interesting to point out that prudent business managers are only trying to maintain competitiveness by achieving cost savings through outsourcing. The typical high tax, welfare state politician doesn't understand the fundamental fact that businesses must minimize cost of production. Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder calls it "unpatriotic." John Kerry refers to the companies that outsource as "Benedict Arnolds."

Same-o, same-o.

Companion post at eTALKINGHEAD.

Kyoto Protocol in Germany

With the CO2 emissions limits of the Kyoto Protocol becoming mandatory on the country of Germany next year, all segments of German society are jockeying for a preferential position. They apparently want to forego requiring reductions in the industrial sector and decided to put the burden on homes and motor vehicles.

"To make its Kyoto target, the government will have to introduce measures forcing private households and the transportation sector to reduce their carbon dioxide emissions," said Matthias Seiche from BUND, an environmental organization.

So, the belching smokestacks of industry are not going to be cleaned up. The average citizen is going to pay the price for Kyoto.

This is going to be a continuing story and it's bound to become more contentious as the general German population learns of the cost they'll be asked to pay. Expect grumbling in all the EU countries.

Also, let us not forget that Al Gore and John Kerry are big proponents of the Kyoto Protocols.

Vampire Bats Kill 13 People

In Northeast Brazil, a record 13 people were killed last month by rabies-carrying bats. Approximately 300 attacks have been documented and several people remain hospitalized.

I'd like to think that the rabid bat problems can be corrected in Brazil. We surely don't need them to travel north like the Africanized killer bees did.

LAWSUIT THREATENED by Goat Hoarder

In a previous post, I reported on a story of a man in Vermont who has 70 goats in his house. Apparently, he believes the reporting of his controversy with authorities has been inaccurate. According to an email I received from the man's son, unless there is "a short correction of the worst errors" in the story, a lawsuit is threatened. However, he may be willing to accept a load of hay. Since I can't afford a load of hay, I'll publish the entire email from Nic Weathersbee.

here is what my father sent to the AP...thought I would pass it on to you as well.


Dear Mr. DeSilva:

The subtended AP file, which brought a private person (me) widespread ridicule and adverse publicity, contains the following numerous errors (highlighted in red [ed. note - bolded & italicized instead]):

The only thing weird about our plight is that the state of Vermont should have spent three years trying to close down a legitimate goat farm, in which my mother invested some $500,000, for the sin of being a slaughter-free, cruelty-free operation. The state has denied us eligibility for loans that are routine for other Vermont farmers, on grounds that cannot be attempted to be believed.

Baaaaaad goat odor, apart from being a flabby effort at a pun (the flabbiest of wit), is a calumny against the goat, who is one of the cleanest, most fastidious, and least odourous of the human and non-human animals with which man associates.

Only the dominant buck (male) goat in rut develops a strong odour, which attracts does (females) and causes them to ovulate. We have about 80 intact males here, right next to a road down which daily pass more malicious busybodies than any little town like Corinth has a right to expect. Yet in almost eight years there has not been a single complaint about odour. About everything else, but not odour. Odour did not figure in the state raid at all.

This sort of easy gag helps to perpetuate a consumer reticence about goat products that the nascent American goat industry strives mightily to overcome.

Have collided. The goats haven't collided with my religious convictions at all. Rather, my seven-year observation of their complex society, their manifest ability to love one another, their demonstration of the whole spectrum of emotional and psychological phenomena than man likes to think peculiar to himself, are what engendered in me a profound spiritual awakening.

Lynn Margulis in Symbiotic Planet points out that all creatures on Earth today have evolved for exactly the same length of time, and thus are equally 'highly' evolved. Man places himself at the top of a ladder that does not exist. If this is so at the mundane level of physical organisation, it is doubly so, a million times so, before god. The Christian Bible says god loves all her creatures. True love is not graduated.

In a ... definitely stinky way. See above. Not stinky at all, let alone 'definitely.'

Three goats ... now there are 300. There has been no willy-nilly population explosion, as implied here. We started at this farm with about 40 goats, with the idea of building the two herds -- cashmere and dairy -- up to about 150 individuals each, through purchase and breeding. The present herd size was planned. What was not planned was who mated with whom. The bucks took this issue in their teeth, broke out, and had their way with the ladies two years running. We have now brought breeding under control and do not plan any more additions to the herds for several years.

Living in his house. The house was empty and unused when I moved the goats in. I live elsewhere.

I converted the house into kidding quarters and hospital because it could be kept warm in cold weather, because ill goats could be isolated and kept quiet in the smaller rooms, and because I could reclassify it as a non-taxable agricultural building, instead of as a taxable dwelling.

Your wire story was drawn from a well-done and complete feature in the Valley News that had even the humane-society people saying it was a smart move to bring the goats into the house during this past winter's brutal cold.

A mix of goat droppings and hay. The house became another barn. It is usual to bed goat barns with hay or straw in winter. It is usual for goat faecal pellets to fall down onto the hay when discharged, rather than, say, flying out the window. All of the implied or outright sarcasm and derision that your story engendered nationwide amongst smart-aleck city comedians is directed at farming practises that are commonplace. The only unusual step I took was to convert an empty, useless dwelling that costs me $350 per month in taxes into an agricultural facility that will cost me about $20 per month in taxes.

Seized 44 deemed unhealthy by a veterinarian. The veterinarian in question was the state vet whose office had launched the raid in the first place. He was working under a massive conflict of interest that must have coloured his judgement markedly, and he has no particular competence with goats.

The probable cause for the raid, according to the state trooper who headed it, was a letter that I had written to Vermont Gov. Jim Douglas asking for justice in getting a state loan. The trooper claimed that the letter stated I had 'starving animals' on the property. My letter said no such thing.

When the raiders found no starving goats, they seized 44 more or less at random for such things as hoof trimming, matted hair coats, and low body scores. The state vet declared these relatively trivial problems to be sufficient cause to seize these animals, presumably just to cover his derriere. How would it have looked if he had been honest and had said that after all the hoopla and expense of the raid, there were no animals that needed seizing?

They left behind a number of goats with more health problems than the ones they took, confirmation of the arbitrary nature of the seizures. They left behind babies crying for their seized mothers.

They took our aged Tasha. She was in the terminal stages of cancer. She was not in pain, she was eating well, and she could have made it to spring to die in the sun. But left in a strange place after a two-hour cattle-trailer ride, she gave up and quit eating. She died after six days in the state's 'care.'

These people, whom you presented around the world as the dispassionate 'authorities,' are stupid, ill-informed, narrow, arrogant, opinionated, self-righteous, rigid, malicious, base, cowardly, the clumsy killers of my beloved old friend Tasha. Tasha was the first milker in the herd. She might have died as she had lived, loved and caressed by me and everyone, and surrounded by the usual dozen or so kids who treated her as Auntie Tasha. Faugh! I didn't even see her off.

We maintain animals here who are skinny, obviously ill, handicapped, or aged. We are a no-slaughter, no-cruelty farm. On ordinary livestock farms, such animals are routinely culled (killed) whilst they still have some meat value. We are being castigated by people who promote slaughter, for the presence here of animals kept for reasons that most good folks would regard as humane.

'He has more goats than he can care for.' I agree with this statement if you add the word I am always careful to use, 'optimally,' to the end of the sentence. For the past three years, since the principals of what was to have been a commercial goat operation left, I have struggled simply to keep as many as possible of my friends alive, with almost no money.

It has been a lifeboat operation, sheer survival. No one in the herd, including me, is overweight -- I lost about 40 pounds over this winter. Grain for all goats was a luxury we could not afford. Hoof trimming, needed but not vital to survival, had to be ignored in favour of giving shots, begging hay, and other tasks that are vital. As for matted coats, no sane goatherder tries to groom non-show goats in a 300-strong herd. We'll shear them when the time comes, and there will be no talk of matted coats.

The State of Vermont, and now Gov. Jim Douglas's office too, owns a large share of the responsibility for our difficulties. Had we been granted the loans of public money we sought, for which we have been eligible and qualified all along, and which were our right as Vermont residents, we would have been in business more than three years ago, and the raid would never have been conceived. Instead, the state tried to starve us out for our agricultural unorthodoxy, then they charged us with starvation.

Weathersbee ... admits he cannot afford to give the herd sufficient care. Weathersbee admitted to no such thing, nor could he have, as it is not true. Given its very wide circulation, this false statement may easily prejudice my trial should I be charged with animal cruelty. The word I used, most deliberately, was 'optimal,' not 'sufficient.'

The latter can be the basis of a cruelty charge. The former merely states that we could be doing better, if we had the resources. As far as I am concerned, with the weight of a 40-year journalistic and editing career behind me, this statement libels and defames me, and could form the basis of a suit at law.

By hook or by crook, but mostly by the love of god, we have gone for three years without the goats' missing a day's hay or grass. At times the hay has not been what it should, or the pasture has been skimpy. These are the vicissitudes of all life forms, including humans.

In ordinary Christianity we are taught to take what god gives us each day, to accept god's will lovingly and without complaint, whether we think it pleasant or unpleasant. I think this applies equally to all god's creatures, goats too. We have had some hard times. But people in a lifeboat do not complain that they're being abused or treated cruelly. They are thankful they didn't drown when the ship sank.

He refuses to get rid of the animals. Another prejudicial misstatement. I have repeatedly told everyone that the goats are not mine. They are leased, under an iron-bound lease designed to protect them from human greed and abuse. The lease specifically forbids 'getting rid of' any non-human animal.

The lease aside, it should not be forgotten that we have spent years and many thousands of dollars to build the herd up to this level. Many of the 100 or so animals we purchased cost from $100 to $200 each. Some bucks born here are worth thousands as breeding stock. Why would I be anxious to 'get rid of' such valuable goats? They are my friends and family, and the basis for any business we might launch. Besides, the humane-society officer candidly acknowledged that she could not guarantee that adopters would not abuse or kill their charges. Of course I resist giving up the goats!

Under certain conditions, the entire lease may be transferred to a new lessee. At the present time I am negotiating just such a transfer, to protect the herd after my death. In that sense I am 'getting rid of' all the animals.

His Buddhist religious views. Though I hold many, many Buddhist teachings to be true and precious, particularly the teachings of universal compassion and the sanctity of all life, I am not a Buddhist. I follow a fairly conventional path based largely on core Christian teachings.

His only income is from monthly disability checks. Anyone with a calculator who cares to multiply $150 by 30 (=$4,500), will see that our costs far outstrip any disability cheque ever awarded. In fact my income is only part of what the farm receives, which comes from diverse and often charitable sources. My step-daughter Kirste, for example, punted a few bucks on the ponies at the track where she works, and won enough to send us $1,200 last month, an enormous help. As I tried to make clear already, we expect god's help if we are to do god's will, and for three long years the hay has always been there.

In exchange, he wants to remain with the goats, living in the barns and fields. Someone who read this accused me of just seeking a cushy nest. In fact I have offered to the organisations I have approached to work here for nothing, caring for the goats and supervising cheese making, until I drop dead. I have also offered to continue to pay the mortgage with my disability income, a contribution of about $800 per month, not pocket change.

Obviously I cannot expect AP to cram all the above niceties and details into such a short file. But I do expect your correspondents to be skilful enough at their professions not to libel people, and not to defame or deride private citizens with so little basis in fact. I have not yet been charged with a crime, I do not seek publicity. This damnable little squib has gone half around the world. I have had to endure burdensome feedback from it already. It has been published in on-line media such as Planet Ark that are accessed by the target consumers for our cheese, and thus may do us material harm. It was even published in Czechoslovakia!

I expect you to take seriously the potential for a lawsuit. I expect a short correction of the worst errors to be published on the same page that carried the original story, in every medium that published it (a Google search of +Weathersbee+goat+Vermont will tell you which they were).

If corrections are published as I ask, I will take no further action. If my expectations are unreasonable, then explain why in an e-mail, and tell me what would be a reasonable remedy. I will accept a load of hay from Barry Stryker, our hay guy. Ignoring me is your surest route to a letter from my nasty lawyer. After all the harm the state has done to us, compounded by the national ridicule stemming from your AP story, I have had it up to here with people refusing to behave like decent human beings.

With my kindest regards,

Chris Weathersbee
manager, Marymead Farm

Frankly, I think Mr. Weathersbee has said everything that needs to be said.

Pigs Fly, 16 Die

(Bellfontaine, Ohio) Have you ever promised to do something when "pigs fly?" Well, according to this story, it's time to pay up. Derrick Selhorst, of Celina, was hauling 190 hogs to a slaughter when his tractor-trailer flipped over, sending the pigs flying. Sixteen died.

It should be noted that future occurrences of this nature will be avoided when the animal restraint laws are implemented across the nation.

Madrid Bombing Suspects Blow Themselves Up

(Madrid, Spain) According to Interior Minister Angel Acebes, as the police approached the hideout, the railway bombing suspects spotted them and started shooting.

Over the next two hours, police evacuated as many people as they could from the building and surrounding area and prepared for an assault on the apartment, he said.

"The special police agents prepared to storm the building and when they started to execute the plan, the terrorists set off a powerful explosion, blowing themselves up," Acebes said.

"There are three that could have blown themselves up, but the possibility of more is not ruled out," he said.

This is quite an indicator of the level of fanaticism of the terrorists. They would rather blow themselves up then be taken into custody.

Dirty Hands Detection

A technology company, eMerge Interactive Inc., in Sebastian, Florida, is now marketing a light-scanning device to detect dirty hands on hospital and restaurant workers. Woo-hoo! There'll be fewer filthy pigs giving out medication or serving up burgers through 21st Century technology.

San Antonio

Cities within the US are constantly being evaluated and ranked based upon studies of many types of data. With regard to San Antonio, Texas, the following has been reported.

San Antonio is the community with the highest percentage of obese adults in the United States, over 31 percent.

San Antonio has the highest rate of binge drinking -- imbibing till drunkenness -- in the entire United States, 23.9 percent.

Maybe it's just me, but it sure seems odd that one city in the whole country would be ranked #1 in blimps AND #1 in boozers.

Something tells me to put a wager on the Spurs for the NBA Championship this year.

Ruling: No Strip Club Regulation

U.S. District Judge Ann Aldrich ruled yesterday that the regulation of strip clubs as proposed by the Ohio Liquor Commission is unconstitutional. Proponents of the regulation claim there is a correlation between crime and strip clubs that serve alcohol, however, they were unable to support their contention.

I wonder if the Liquor Commission inspectors are in need of legal justification for spending a lot of time in strip clubs.

2004 Polly Awards

(Wilmington, Delaware) The Collegiate Network was formed to focus public awareness on the politicization of American college classrooms. The methods used include Internet reports of declines in educational standards and the annual recognition of the most outrageous examples of campus politicization, called the Polly Awards.

Yesterday, the Collegiate Network announced the co-winners of the 2004 Polly Award identifying, for the seventh consecutive year, the most outrageous politicization and double standards in higher education. In a tie for first place, the winners are:

Sex-Week at Yale
Yale University student sponsors �Sex Week at Yale� using Yale funds, Yale facilities and with the support of Yale faculty and administrators. Several of the events were co-sponsored by Wicked Pictures, an adult film company that provided one of the keynote speakers�porn star Devinn Lane.

Multicultural Porn at the University of California Santa Barbara
A University of California, Santa Barbara student received acclaim from professors and administrators for his Chicano Studies thesis on �Gay Men of Color in Porn.� The project was presented as part of the UCSB Multicultural Center�s tax-payer funded �Race Matters Series� in an effort to legitimize pornography as an academic pursuit.

It's been demanded historically that institutions of higher learning provide intellectual and leadership skills, but, in these two cases, the co-winners have veered from tradition. Yale and UC Santa Barbara have decided to promote sexual promiscuity and deviance.

A safe assumption is that most Americans would probably rather not have their tax dollars used to fund these activities.

Operation Blue Peacock

The British National Archives has released a secret 1957 Ministry of Defense document indicating that scientists considered using chickens to warm the casing of a plutonium land mine. The chickens body heat, about 1,000 BTU (British Thermal Units) per bird per day, would prevent the mine's mechanism from freezing.

Understandably, this information was received with great skepticism. Andy Oppenheimer, co-editor of Jane's World Armies, said, "I have a feeling that it's an April Fool." The Times of London wrote, "Is today the day to reveal the chicken-powered nuke?" However, Tom O'Leary, head of education at the National Archives, said he had no doubt that the document was authentic.

Officials decided in 1957 to acquire 10 "Blue Peacock" land mines, each weighing 16,000 pounds (7,250 kilograms), and to station them with the British Army of the Rhine in Germany. However, in 1958 the Ministry of Defense Weapons Policy Committee decided that work on "Blue Peacock" should stop, after reservations emerged about the fallout hazard.

The nuclear chicken proposal is detailed in the April 2-Oct. 30 exhibition entitled "The Secret State" at the National Archives.

I'm not convinced that this is on the up and up. Simple things are tripping up my thinking. For example, how were the chickens supposed to be fed and who in their right mind would go to a nuclear land mine on a daily basis to do it? I also find it hard to believe that the device, a sophisticated temperature-sensitive plutonium warhead surrounded by high explosives, would not quickly deteriorate in the environment of a chicken house.

Without more information, I'm not buying it. The story is just too implausible. Maybe someone is trying to pull the chain of the animal rights extremists.

Guard and Bark

(Paradise Valley, AZ) I've always had an appreciation for the ability of dogs to be trained to perform specific valuable functions and this story caught my eye as being something new. Abbott, a 4-year-old Belgian Malinois, joined the Paradise Valley Police Department and

. . . is skilled at tracking, protecting his handler, and conducting building searches and "guard and bark."

The latter technique has the dog holding a criminal by barking until the handler arrives. If a perpetrator attempts to flee, the dog will bite him.

Officials are reluctant to discuss a little known pilot program that teaches dogs to read suspects their rights during apprehension. It's these unique capabilities that explains why specially trained dogs are worth tens of thousands of dollars.

Who Let The Dogs Out?

(Kentville, Nova Scotia) This is a somewhat dated wrong place, wrong time story that's been edited for clarity.

Royal Canadian Mounted Police dogs from across the province were participating in training exercises at nearby Camp Aldershot when a car thief ditched a stolen car and fled into the woods. Kentville police informed the RCMP and Constable Fraser said two or three canine units took part in the chase - to the tune of Who Let the Dogs Out, which was playing in one of the dog handler's vehicles.

"He chose the wrong time and the wrong place to steal a vehicle," said RCMP Constable Gary Smith. "Because there was an exercise going on in the area, we were able to send several dogs."

Hearing several barking dogs AND the song must have made the car thief think he was dreaming.

Many Teachers Fail Certification Exams

(Philadelphia, PA) As demonstrated by this story, the unacceptably high failure rate in American public schools doesn't just apply to the students.

The School District of Philadelphia released figures last week showing half of its seventh- and eighth-grade teachers who took the federally mandated exams in English, math, social studies and science failed.

The Pennsylvania Department of Education reported that excluding Philadelphia, 23 percent of middle school teachers statewide failed the tests.

The state won't release any details, stating it's up to each school district to provide results for their teachers. I think they'll be hesitant to release much information. Can you imagine the impact on a class if the students knew their teacher flunked certification?

Carnival of the Consumers #1

It's more than a linkfest. Conceived by Jeff Doolittle, the Carnival of the Consumers promises to be useable, more or less, depending on participation. It provides a venue for bloggers to praise or complain about their experience with a product or service. The inaugural edition is posted. I think this is a good idea. Go visit.